8:20

A few months ago a hidden, yet undiscovered door opened inside my mind, and let the horrors of the world in. Now this door, which is also an exit - has become closed. I don't know how, I guess it's just the nature of things to move along.

I'm very much relieved and strangely enough a bit nostalgic too. When you're open to the negativity of the world, you're of course hammered but it also transforms your value system. It just puts every little thing into a different perspective, which is good. We need that. The existential pain that is unleashed during the experience hightens all your senses and makes you vulnerable to any kind of input. This kind of pain makes you centered in your own body and enables you to judge things directly, based on the feeling they give you - the real bodily sensation. Beause we feel stuff in our body all the time, it's only that our society conditioned us to a daily practice of involuntary astral projection into the blank spaces of human consciousness. The media, the school system, all the new gadgets we use teleport us into another world. Our body is not ours anymore, we have lost all connection to it, it's percieved by us as mere abstraction.

The way back to Eden is to reconnect with our organism, because that is our real self.
I'm so far away from myself right now, it seems almost impossible to reunite, but I know I have to do it.